THE ELEPHANT WHO WAS A CLOUD
One day, the ELEPHANT WHO WAS A CLOUD floated into the land of the MONKEY KING, who immediately took advantage of this air-borne visitor for his own FLYING PURPOSES.
“Perfect!” exclaimed the KING when his servants strapped the traveling compartment to the back of the ELEPHANT. In India, this conveyance is called a ‘HOWDAH’. The MONKEY KING sat on an EMBROIDERED PILLOW and rode all over the place in it.
Before long, the ELEPHANT WHO WAS A CLOUD rained and whatever its rain fell upon grew hugely.
“Splendid!” said the MONKEY KING.
Also pleased was the PRINCESS GABOOLALOOLA, his fair daughter, who liked to eat.
“MORE! MORE!” she called. “YUM! YUM! YUM! YUM!”
When the MONKEY KING passed over a vegetable garden, he ordered the ELEPHANT WHO WAS A CLOUD to rain. The egg plants swelled up, the tomatoes bent their stalks, the carrots burst out of the ground. The PRINCESS GABOOLALOOLA began to pick, when a shadow fell over her and with it came a “snopping” sound: “SNOP! SNOP! SNOP! SNOP!”
A Snapdragon had gurgled down all the delicious ELEPHANT RAIN pouring from the drain pipe above it and had gone in search of something more. “Anything will do!” it said. “SNOP! SNOP!” it went through the roses, the daisies, the petunias, the lilacs, the sweet-peas.
Eventually, it SNOPPED its way through the MONKEY KING’S entire KINGDOM until not a blossom remained and it was just as big as PRINCESS GABOOLALOOLA herself had become. And so KERRBOB – as the growling, head-dipping SNAPDRAGON came to be called – decided to take up a MUSICAL INSTRUMENT in order to keep its mind off its BELLY until SPRING came again and everything would have grown back. He chose the CHURCH ORGAN as best for his size, and the MONKEY KING agreed to have one built.
KERRBOB sang while he played the BIGGER-THAN-ANY-OTHER MUSICAL INSTRUMENT:
KERRBOB’S BLOOMETTY BLOSSOMY SNAPPLETY SNOPPLETY SONG
also known as
THE SONG OF MY TUM
Pass the ketchoppetty, lovely ketchuppetty!
Pass the ketchoppetty do!
Wriggletty Wroggletty Piggletty Poggletty
Masheddy Mosheddy Misheddy Musheddy
Slurp it ecstotically
That is the Song
Of my Tum!
In his HOWDAH, the MONKEY KING listened to this song for the HUNDREDTH TIME, while he watched the news on his IPAD. It reported on the appearance of TIGERS, CROCODILES, SNAKES, GIANTS-WITH-ONLY-ONE-EYE and a PINK-HAIRED PLATYPUS in the SKY.
“It’s all a MYSTERY since no one can explain it,” the news announcer said. “One thing is sure, it has NOTHING to do with KERRBOB’S ORGAN PLAYING and his SINGING that EVERYONE is ENJOYING and HOPES VERY, VERY MUCH that he will play EVERY THURSDAY, like today, or any other day that he wishes.”
“Or all night and all week,” muttered the MONKEY KING, who looked up to see a ONE-EYE-IN-THE-CENTRE-OF-ITS-FOREHEAD GIANT trundle up and demand, “SOMETHING TO EAT! ANYTHING AT ALL! YOU’LL DO!” and the ELEPHANT WHO WAS A CLOUD charged the GIANT and passed right through to the OTHER SIDE.
“Hah!” chortled the MONKEY KING, but the ELEPHANT HOLE had already filled in and the OGRE gobbled up the houses down below, the occupants still seated on their sofas and armchairs, and IT gobbled up EVERYTHING ELSE!
The next day, the IPAD announced, MOST FEARSOME GIANT GOBBLES EVERYBODY AND EVERYTHING UP! while KERRBOB played and played at his CHURCH ORGAN, with more and more CLOUDY TIGERS, CROCODILES, and GIANTS appearing in the SKY ABOVE!
The MONKEY KING swung through the trees consulting all the OLD NEWS in the newspapers blown there by the WINDS from KERRBOB’S ORGAN, but they all agreed with his IPAD that EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE IS GONE!
“The only thing to do,” he decided, “is to do something about it.” He set about collecting all the NEWS in the land, stacking it up and sitting on the very top just as if it were his THRONE. “THAT,” he said, “should put the SITUATION completely under CONTROL.”
From this HEIGHT, he had a very good view of a CIRCUS PERFORMANCE that all the CLOUDY CREATURES were putting on with the help of KERRBOB’S ORGAN PLAYING. The PRINCESS GABOOLALOOLA, munching on a SACK OF POPCORN and wearing a very pretty EXTRA-EXTRA-EXTRA-LARGE-SIZE DRESS patterned with daisies and buttercups from shoulder to knee, came and stood beside her HIGHLY PLACED father.
When the CIRCUS PERFORMERS began to fall out of the sky and TUMBLE ABOUT on the ground, the MONKEY KING called out, “KERRBOB, pay more attention to what you’re playing!” Turning, the MONKEY KING saw what had distracted the busily TWEETING-AT-HIS-IPHONE KERRBOB: the blushing and likewise TWEETING PRINCESS GABOOLALOOLA in her flowery dress.
“Fetch the BOOK OF EVERYTHING!” commanded the MONKEY KING. Under ‘Snapdragons and Princesses,’ there wasn’t anything. He took out his IPAD and went to WIKIPOODIA. There it was! ‘SNAPDRAGONS. Purpose of: to kidnap PRINCESSES. Remedy: KNIGHT-IN-SHINING-ARMOUR.’”
He hopped onto the ELEPHANT WHO WAS A CLOUD and set off, but all he could find were PILES OF RUSTY ARMOUR until he came upon a HORSE that wore saddle bags with PROPERTY OF THE KNIGHT-IN-SHINING-ARMOUR stamped on them. The HORSE merely whinnied to all the MONKEY KING’s inquiries.
“Just rain on him a bit, would you!” the MONKEY KING ordered his ELEPHANT CLOUD.
“Here, stop that!” cried the HORSE. “I’ve been trying to tell you that my master – the KNIGHT-IN-SHINING-ARMOUR – is having tea with the Princess MEEMEE but he did leave his MAGIC MIRROR for anyone who wants to do the HERO’S JOB himself.”
The MONKEY KING dug about in the horse’s saddlebags where he located the MAGIC MIRROR. When he looked into it, someone noble, strong and courageous stared back at him. His lip curled bravely.
“At last, I have found my TRUE SELF,” declared the MONKEY KING, “and I really could do with a shave!”
On his return, the MONKEY KING nearly fell out of his HOWDAH. Down below, the SNAPDRAGON KERRBOB had PRINCESS GABOOLALOOLA in HIS GRIP. SHE had HIM in HERS. In front of them stood a PINK-HAIRED PLATYPUS, reading from a BLACK IPHONE, while the ONE-EYED GIANT played a WEDDING MARCH on KERRBOB’S ORGAN!
As soon as the CEREMONY was over, the HAPPY COUPLE looked at the MONKEY KING who grinned as he handed them their wedding present. “This looking-glass will also tell you if you need a shave,” he said to KERRBOB.
“How very THIN, how very BEAUTIFUL I am!” declared PRINCESS GABOOLALOOLA. Thinking of all the ADMIRERS that would soon be lining up to meet her, she passed the mirror to KERRBOB.
When he looked into the glass, KERRBOB saw a little snapdragon not at all suitable for a LARGE AND HUNGRY PRINCESS. Having thought better of things, he wandered away in search of a nice garden where he might tweet with the rhododendrons.
The MONKEY KING was most pleased at this turn of events and he dutifully set off to return the MAGIC MIRROR to its proper owner. Afterwards, he planned to visit all sorts of people in FAR-OFF PLACES. “They will be most pleased to see me in my howdah,” he said, and the ELEPHANT WHO WAS A CLOUD began to RAIN – just a little.